"Grow up and be a man!" (poem)

Mother died when I was young.
I drew my dad a picture.
He took one look at it,
and then he
slapped me across the face, saying
"Grow up and be a man!"

I don't want to be hurt like this,
so I grow up and
I create a system
to regulate emotion.
I must be a hero,
but why is everyone fighting me?
I shoot them in the face,
saying "grow up and be a man!"

It's been so many years,
but I'm still having nightmares.
I'm still having flashbacks,
I'm never going to wake up
from this nightmare.

Now this system I've created
just killed the one I love.
The tears come back after so many years,
but it's too late to stop them now.

This system I've created is
now trying to cure me.
I've lost control of my anger,
and I scream,
"there's nothing wrong with me,
there's something wrong with you!"

I'm trying to destroy my own creation,
but it's too late.
They are going to kill me,
saying,
"Grow up and be a man!"

I've given up killing.
I've given it all up.
But can I be forgiven?

This poem is my interpretation of Korse from Gerard Way's The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys. This is also sort of about how society sends the message that emotion is a weakness and that men aren't supposed to be emotional. It's also saying that people may create something that later ends up hurting them.